Ref. : http://spas.about.com/od/massa2/a/sensual.htm
Sensual massage is a great way to build intimacy and closeness with your partner. But massage is a skill, and it's beneficial to learn some basic massage techniques so that what you do actually feels good to your partner.
One way to learn basic Swedish massage techniques like effleurage is to take a class from a local learning center.
If you can't find a class, you can arrange with a massage therapist to show you how to give a massage. They will focus on basic massage techniques, but with a willing partner you can use some creativity and go places that the professional massage therapist can't.
Another way to learn sensual massage techniques at home is "The Art of Sensual Massage" (compare prices)" by Gordon Inkeles. This fully illustrated book and DVD teaches you how to give a sensual massage at home. Keep in mind, however, that massage relaxes the body, whereas lovemaking excites it. It's best if you approach massage as an end in itself, not merely as a prelude to lovemaking.
Sensual Massage Toolkit
- A massage table compare prices will make it much easier to give your partner a massage without hurting your back. And they're not that expensive anymore.
- Keep a few sets of sheets just for the massage table as they will get oil on them.
- Massage oil to give your hands "glide" is essential , but you don't have to spend a lot of money on a special "sensual massage oil." A nice, inexpensive choice is sweet almond oil(compare prices). You can also add essential oils to your oil to make it an aromatherapy massage. Rose, ylang-ylang and geranium are all good for romantic encounters.
The Basics of How To Give A Sensual Massage
- Set a romantic atmosphere with candles, rose petals and relaxing spa music. Make sure the room is warm enough so that your partner won't be cold.
- Bring the attitude that you are giving something to the other person, not that you are trying to get something.
- Start with the person face-down, preferably in a table with a face cradle so they don't crank their neck. If you don't have a massage table, it's better to use a firm surface like a floor that you've covered with a few blankets. It will also give you better access to their body.
- Start with their back. Fold the sheet back, put a little oil in your hand (make sure they're warm) and make light hand-over-hand motions to warm up their tissues. You can work on their knots a little bit but don't try to do serious therapeutic massage. The point is just to enjoy connecting with your partner in a relaxing way and make them feel good.
- Generally the order of a massage is back and legs, then you have your partner turn over. You massage their legs and feet, then their arms, and finally their neck and shoulders. You can also give a scalp massage.
- When you're giving a sensual massage, you can massage areas that are generally off limits, like breasts, but again, it's best if your attitude is one of giving instead of having an agenda of "getting her in the mood". Of course if that happens, you're free to go where you want with it!
Sensual Massage and The Spa
Sensual massage is not offered in a professional spa. The massage therapists who work at spas are trained in therapeutic massage, which is based on Swedish massage techniques. If you asked for sensual massage at a spa, it will be interpreted as a request for sexual contact.
It is a breach of spa etiquette to ask for sex as part of a therapeutic massage. If you do, the massage therapist will explain that is not the purpose of this massage. They may continue working (unless you persist) or end the massage.
Men sometimes ask for sex during massage in an indirect fashion by directing them "work higher" when they get to their thighs or "work lower" when they massage their chest. They also ask the therapist to remove the sheet or ask if the therapist does "extras" or "happy endings." None of this is appropriate -- or legal -- in a spa setting.
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